Living Lund

(Image from citycvhswm on Flickr) To begin with the good message: parts of the myth surrounding Scandinavia as an Eldorado of fair-haired, breathtakingly beautiful Viking-maidens is true. Of course, not every girl encountered on the streets is Barbie come alive or a man’s wet dream – but one gets one’s share of tall and slender beauties, complete with ruddy complexion, ample bosoms, puppet faces and delightful manes of blond (and brunette) hair. Not to forget their brilliant blue eyes, which many men would love to see resting on them with love or at least interest! However, what those sapphire orbs say most of the time is a simple sentence: I’m better than you.

And here’s the problem. The part of the Northland-saga which is unfounded is the alleged fact that since all girls are hot, they don’t know their worth. They do and many even seem to overestimate it. To talk up girls can be quite a chore, especially if you try to do it in a lingo other than Swedish. Profound Swedish skills – at least enough to establish a communication basis – will make it a lot easier for you not to be discarded immediately as a foreigner.

Generally, for starters, forget “opposites attract” and focus on “birds of a feather flock together”. If you are tall, Nordic and sport one of those flamboyant haircuts as Swedish men do, all the better for you. If you are – like the author of these lines – of a more southerly complexion and maybe not as “lang”, try make up for it with charm… but no kissing of hands and the like, you are more bound to odd them out instead of have them fall for you. Don’t rely on the fact that you come from somewhere else to make you interesting. (A little hint: confidence and the display of wealth are internationally known but of special importance in these parts of the world.)

Of course you get girls that are very open and welcoming of internationals, the majority however might require a proof that you are worth their time. The two magic words in that regard: FRIENDS and HOUSEPARTIES. Having a Swedish guy/girlfriend that introduces you to his or her friends and attests your merits might be you tricket into a boreal heart! And what better opportunity than a house party with the second key to a Swedes (m/f) heart: alcohol. With her warmed up by her poison of choice and calmed by your legitimization via a countryman of hers (“Yeah, X. is from country Y., but still he’s a great guy!), you might be surprised how fast things can move somewhere else.

Once you tickled a girl’s fancy, she might be far from shy in letting you know and taking the matter into her manicured hands. The author recalls at this point a memorable night in Denmark, where he was picked up by two girls at a red light like a cheap tramp, taken home, taken advantage of… and then kicked out (not that there are or were any complaints in regards to this procedure!).

As you surely found out, girls here are quite independent. To bind her to you for a longer period of time might prove quite a task. Scandinavians are notorious for being more fickle when it comes to relationships and fidelity might not have the same value to her as to you. Since the author has never been in a proper relationship with a Norse woman, he cannot give you further advice than the obvious: be careful whom you give your heart to. What the author also has been unable to find out is why Scandinavian girls cannot manage to shut their mouth while chewing gum. If anybody does so, please report here at “Living Lund”!

A few concluding remarks: It is Sweden which, more than any other Nordic country, enjoys the reputation of being home to gorgeous girls. But you, my fellow Lund residents are, lucky! Just 40 minutes away by train lays Copenhagen, city of angels! In the author’s opinion, Danish girls can beat the Swedish ones every day of the week and even give them a head start to it, both in beauty and in hard-to-get-ness! If their language doesn’t weird you out and you enjoy the challenge, step up your game a level and go for a “pige” instead of a “tjej”!

Should any Swedish or Danish, Norwegian, Icelandic, Farör or other Scandinavian girl read this and feel the urge to converse privately with the author of these lines about it over a bottle of wine and in the shine of candles, feel free to contact “Living Lund” to this end… Guest post of a non-Swedish student living in Lund since August, 2011. * (Any opinion expressed herein represents entirely the author’s experience based on living for half a year in Denmark and half a year in Sweden. Results may vary).

As you maybe know, Swedes love fish. One Swedish specialty is “surströmmning”, which is fermented herring. The herring is fished in spring and then left in barrels to ferment for a few months. Before it is being sold, the fish is canned and left to ferment even more until the developing gases bend the top and bottom of the can. In fact, there is so much pressure on the can that it is forbidden to bring on some airlines due to the danger of explosion. If you think fermented herring sounds like a delicious meal or a good challenge, be careful when opening the can: the smell is beyond words (and not in a positive way). For those a bit less daring we prepared an easy-to-make and more importantly delicious herring recipe:

You need:

• 1 herring filet (or other fish)
• juice of ½ orange
• potatoes
• (frozen) spinach
• ½ onion
• ½ garlic (optional)
• ½ apple(optional)
• oil, salt, pepper (and any other spices you like)

Here is what you do:

1. Cut the potatoes into wedges and put them in an oven-proved dish. Apply a mixture of oil, salt and pepper and put in the oven for approx. 30min at 170° degrees. Mix the potatoes occasionally.
2. Put the fish in an oven-proved dish, seasons it with salt and pepper and pour the orange juice over it. Put in the oven for approx. 20min at 170° degrees.
3. Cut onion and garlic and roast them. Add the spinach with a bit of water and heat it. Cut the apple and mix it in.
4. Enjoy!

 

Although the name sounds strange to you, it is an official word and stands for the name of a small city in Denmark, approximately 40 minutes away from Copenhagen Central Station. What can you do in HUMLEBÆK? Those of you who are interested in design, art, architecture and creative things can now keep on reading, because HUMLEBÆK has one of the most famous Museums of Modern Art in Denmark/Sweden, called Louisiana with an extensive amount of modern and contemporary art. It is also known for its architectural exhibitions, inside and outside the museum. The remarkable fact is that the museum is directly located at the coast line with a great view across the Øresund. The museum’s permanent collection includes more than 3000 works and is one of the largest in Scandinavia. It shows works from artists, including Picasso, Giacometti, Dubuffet, Yves Klein, Andy Warhol, Rauschenberg, Henry Moore, Louise Bourgeois, Philip Guston, Morris Louis, Jorn, Baselitz, Polke, Kiefer, and Per Kirkeby. Every year there are 4-6 exhibitions. If you are interested in it you can meet some friends and make a day trip to the museum. Since, it is in Denmark it takes a while reaching the area. However, it is possible to take a special route, which is filled with many attractions on the way. You can start in Lund and take the train to Helsingborg. From there you ca buy a special ticket, which includes the trip with the ferry from Helsingborg to Helsingør (Denmark) and then another train down to HUMLEBÆK and the entrance to the museum. (Tourist friendly we would say). Another option is the ‘Öresund Rundt’ ticket which includes the same things, but another condition is that you cross the “border” 2 times. So you either go the way we just explained and after you saw the museum you go further down to Copenhagen and take the bridge to cross the border or you do it the other way around and start with the bridge and go up to HUMLEBÆK and take the ferry afterwards again back to Sweden. Therefore, we suggest that you make it a day trip when it is nice weather, so you can stop in between and walk around. Tip: When you go by ferry you can see Hamlet’s Castle (Shakespeare) on the way to Helsingør.

Prices:

Admission DKK 95 
Students with student ID DKK 85 

Opening Hours:

Tuesday – Friday 11-22
Saturday and Sunday 11-18
Public Holidays 11-18
Monday closed

https://www.facebook.com/louisianamuseum

http://www.louisiana.dk/dk/Service+Menu+Right/English

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Z3rjM8BN0XU

If our post from yesterday about dating Swedish men confused you, today we’re bringing a true story about how hard it is to start a relationship in Sweden. This is the story of a Scottish woman who moved to Sweden and realized that the things she took for granted (such as the men making the first move) are far from happening here. Swedish men are just special, aren’t they?

Hope it will clarify things for you, instead of making them even more blurry. So girls, take the first step, cause even if you think it’ll kill you to try, it might actually lead to a beautiful love story. Guys, if you’re tired of waiting for the international women to get you, just man up and make the first step. I think it’s actually pretty exciting. So…it goes like this:

“I don’t expect very much from men. I’m quite capable of supporting myself. In my first seven months in Stockholm I moved, dragging cases, boxes, a little cart from IKEA and a myriad of ICA bags no less than eight times, all on my ownsome. I wield a mean electric drill, can change a tire and I laugh in the face of complicated tax returns. However.

I expect them to seduce me.

It’s only fair. We have to go through childbirth for heaven’s sake, surely the excruciating agony and inside-churning terror of going in for that first kiss when there is no guarantee that the kiss-ee won’t respond with “urgh, what are you doing?!” balances the scales?

Further, it’s a matter of clarity. When the accepted convention is that the man will make the moves (albeit with plenty of ever so subtle encouragement), if he does not do so, it is a reasonable assumption that he isn’t interested and you can go along your merry way.There is no such clarity here in Sweden.

There is a boy I like. We meet for coffee on a fairly regular basis. There is often encouraging body language (mirroring, leaning towards one another, occasional brushes of knees under the table that very nearly make my head explode), and our text-banter is the stuff of legend. However. There has been, as yet, no attempt from him to get to know me better. You know, nakedly. So I figured that he was, for unfathomable reasons, immune to my charms and put the whole thing down to a friend situation, albeit with the occasional risk of head-explosion.

Until, I happened to describe our most recent coffee to a Swedish friend who promptly diagnosed that he is interested, and waiting for me to make a move. Me to make a move! I never heard of such a thing. Not least as, how am I expected to go in for a snog with someone who is practically a foot taller than me? I will definitely lose the advantage of seductive surprise if I start carrying a crate around, and I am almost certain that a flying leap will not end well. So we’re stuck.

On the other hand, recently I went to the cinema with a friend. There’s never been anything that I would describe as a flirtatious frisson between us, so when he asked me to see a film, I happily wandered along wearing a big woolly jumper and glasses. At the end of the evening, he walked me home and said something to the effect of “good date, let’s do it again sometime.” What? Date?! But I’m wearing a big woolly jumper and glasses! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a false eyelashes and Wonderbra kind of girl, but the poor chap deserved better than a big woolly jumper and glasses. If only I had realised.

To be fair, whether or not a man is interested is always something of a mystery; but when there are certain conventions in place, you’ve got at least a rough map with which to navigate those complicated waters towards true lurve. I don’t mind going Dutch, but I do miss that clear signal, if he reaches for the bill, that he considers it to be a date. If there are any such conventions in Sweden I have yet to discover them, so I sit in coffee shops, trying to stop my head from exploding, wondering if equality in matters of getting to know one another nakedly is all it’s cracked up to be?”

By Claire Duffy- http://yourlivingcity.com/stockholm-guide/dating-sweden/

Looking for some new Swedish curiosities, we stumbled upon a very funny post of an American woman. She presents us the A-Z of dating Swedish men. So, for our international readers who are planning on conquering the heart of a Swedish man, read this first :) As for the Swedish man reading it, do you recognize yourselves in this portrait?

“So let’s figure out the A to Z of Swedish men:

A – American Dating, what’s that? “We have sex first, then see each other.”
B – Beautiful and blond. How awesome is that?
C – Confusing; few understand the male species and even less understand the Swedish man
D – Dutch dates are possible, especially if in Sweden.
E – Equal opportunity. Hold that door for yourself.
F – Fashionable. Men sport color and style in Sweden!
G – Growing chest hair, not a fur coat, is needed. (Anonymous comment from a male friend)
H – Hair gel is a necessity, not an option.
I – IKEA will be the ‘big step’ in your lives as couple.
J – Jeans, can they get any tighter?
K – Kinky … so the rumors say…
L – Lagom. They want life and love and everything else in between to be “just right” or rolling down the middle of the road. Pushing men too hard left or right, risks alienating them and sending them away.
M – Mysterious. Ask many questions, answer few of their own.
N – Nagging is what girls may feel when the Swedes are unresponsive. It’s okay, give the guys some space and time to write/text you back.
O – Obtuse, like any man, the Swedish man has proven to be equally if not more obtuse at times.
P – Punctual; don’t show up late for a date.
Q – Quiet and shy describes 90% of Swedish men in Sweden and 10% abroad. Okay, exaggeration but they lose their very quiet nature when going abroad.
R – Rude; if you don’t know the ways of Swedes, they can be perceived as rude. This is especially true if you believe the man should pay for dates, etc when he is more in dutch / equal paying.
S – Sambo, rhymes with mambo, is the traditional way for Swedish being ‘together’ but not married.
T – Text messaging is the best way to communicate with Swedish men. It may be the best way to communicate in general for Swedes.
U – Unemotional, hard-to-read, and sometimes stoic, the Swedish man keeps his feelings to himself.
V – Valentine’s Day is nearly nonexistent in Sweden; don’t fret if nothing happens on this un-special day.
W – Wintertime is the period in the year to not dump your swede. Stay inside and cuddle during the miserable Swedish November. When springtime approaches, feel free to move on to greener grass.
X -
Y – Youthful appearance but sagacious within.
Z – Zealous with text messaging. Really? I still have not understood the obsession with texting. :P”

Anything to add for this A-Z?

Reblogged from http://lostinstockholm.com/2010/03/20/the-a-to-z-guide-on-dating-swedish-men/